im down...

haha...i think these few years will b my dull years...hard to overcome..but i can go thru it..wen i saw their photos..i tot i can really let go but indeed NOPE...my heart really hurts..yesterday morning i msg my ex..i said..if there is fairy godmother ..n she pops out in my dream..i hope she can fulfil my dream..tat one DReam..my heart stops beating my brain dies...do u noe how much i hope to gif up everythin which i have now...wat he replied?he called me to move forward...move on ...i replied sorry..he told me not to say sorry...i should hv apologize to myself...shud make the best out of wat i hv now......dear,,do u noe i do stand up....do u noe i did put my full effort in my finals...i study really hard for it,,,i did discipline myself...i tell myself im gona do well in this finals..after tat im gona go KL n find u...at least can c u ...tats more than enuf....now u r sayin im not movin 4ward...im really disappointed wif his words...now my dreams shattered into pieces...i do hope we can reconcile...but in vain...he is AVAILABLE...this will b the 2nd time seeing him wif his gf......wat can i do?I WAN TO DO MY BEST....ACHIEVE MY GOALS N DREAMS..his words will alwiz in my heart...his words will b strong motivation...dear tx 4 ur golden words..it hurts me but its effective....im down 2day doesnt mean i will down 4eva...i will prove to myself .....prove to u....I CAN DO IT!from now onwards...CAREENA...wont b the same old Careena...I will handle my things...i m 21 mah...as wat u say...im big enuf to think.....to tik k of myself..sure i will...u better too take care ok...muz love ur gf more each day.....bless u guys.....dear i chap lahh...hope everythin goes well in ur carrier...drink more water....if both ur legs feel lethargic,immerse both into warm water..u wil feel better gah....okok!althou u din hear me...but i believe u noe how to tik k of urself.....love u..