no mood

careena jz seems to b no mood....my mood is like weather ....changing moods all e time...i jz feel lots of things in my mind..i jz feel like yelling out..jz feel like having sumthin sweet...undescribable feelings in me...im like a lost sheep lost in the desolate jungle..searching ways to escape from the wilderness..where m i?can sumwan jz bring me bak?can sumwan gif me a hand?thousands of worries n anxieties in me...im now enshrouded wif the mist of worries n sadness...where m i to go?my life pages seem to b bored n dull....black? white?i myself still in the blur state...hope my sadness will gradually fade away..or else im gona suffer...im suffocating!i barely able to breathe...yesterday i again looked bk OURS PHOTOS...hahaa i cried..ya i cried...i jz tot i can stand n turn to a better tougher person but in vain...i try so hard..iterbnm indeed trying...im moving...but it seems sumthin holding me bk...the photos?the memories?the time we hav spent together?dis afternoon..i saw a couple givin each other a hug...i started to reminisce to lovely happy moments we hav been thru...ya he is still in my mind...but im no more in him..im the NOBODY..the nobody here means nothin to him anymore..no0 matter wat happens to me...its NOTHING TO HIM anymore..he is no longer there 4 me...he is no longer emerged in my lovely dreams..the dreams gona vanished foreva n eva...y?y nid to torture me?cruel.....feel like killing myself...how many years i nid to hold on to dis?m i absurd enuf to kip on holding this?i miss his smile..i miss his coolness to me...i miss him everything...i miss my dear again n again....MY SOUL DIES.....my mind stop working...my heart stops beating.....im overall dead...im n dead soul now...CHONG BENG SOON U R KILLING ME...